I've been dating a guy the last few weeks: as in, allowing myself to be bought drinks, taken out dancing, and kissed occasionally at my doorstep. The guy in question seems nice enough, and even semi enjoyable, but my body just refuses to get butterflies and my mind refuses to stop dwelling on our differences as well as his just-not-totally-handsome-enough-ness. I can't convince myself I'd ever want to get """"serious,"""" but I haven't considered sex to be out of the question.
Tonight, while he was driving me home, he said "so... I have to see you again."
When we pulled over on my street and kissed goodnight, I told him I was tempted to invite him upstairs. He had been giving a rather valiant effort for some time, after all. To my great surprise, he told me that while he wanted to come up to my apartment, he thought it would be better if we "waited."
I'm sorry? Did I hear you correctly? This is a French guy we're talking about here. That's not "guy" or "French." Not to mention that this suggests entirely honorable intentions. Which might actually get me in trouble with a guy who ignites no butterflies. B says I should cue him in on this so I don't hurt him. Honestly, being so often on the other end of the stick I can't fathom being in such a position.
Are all men naturally programmed to ditch if they get sex too easily? Do the ones that actually have desire/intention to stick around want to put off sex just for the sake of prohibiting their own biological mechanisms to be jerks?? And, if so, does this really mean that a girl has to live her life denying the men who give her butterflies lest she gets a kick in the heart and a no show the morning after?
well phoque!
Turns out that humans don't value things that come too easily. Money love sex new shoes all fall into the same abyss. Easy come IS easy go. That which I worked for I will fight for. Go easy on your heart - Great wisdom arrives on the coat tails of great suffering ;-)
ReplyDeleteIf you arent feeling butterflies or some kind of lustful thought about this guy, i can make it very easy for you.. HE ISNT THE ONE! lol
ReplyDeleteIf you dont know after 2 dates that you dont get the tingles from them, if the sound of their name doesnt put a grin on your face, he isnt the one... dont lead him on! If he is getting serious (and a man not wanting to have sex is being VERY SERIOUS) then you dont want to drag it on and end up hurting him.
When its right, you know.. it comes easy...
Great relationships can come from courting, from one night stands, from any kind of situation. In this day and age, how soon you put out does not deter a guy from taking you seriously IMO